Healing
by A.Heart's.Shrapnel
Summary: When Jacob dies Bella wishes she had followed him into death. She’s left to raise their daughter alone, or so she thinks. Will fate step in and offer her another path? Extended summary inside.
1. The Basics

**Story**** ::** _Healing_

**Beta**** ::** _I don't have one for this story yet, so anyone willing could PM me or let me know in a review? Till I find someone I'm sorry for mistakes you may find throughout the story._

**Summary**** ::** _When Jacob dies Bella wishes she had followed him into death. She's left to raise their daughter alone, or so she thinks. Will fate step in and offer her another path? Will she accept this path and heal in time? Can you have two soul-mates in life? _

_The white knight isn't always obvious but he always comes through for his princess. _

**Warnings**** ::** _It's rated M for a reason, For starters the first chapter I was told is a little gruesome so that's one reason, and there will be sex later so if you're not old enough or mature enough to read please leave now._

**Little History / Time-Frame ****::** _This story takes place four years after __New Moon__. Bella did go back to get Edward from the Volturi, but when they got back she asked the Cullens to leave. After explaining to Edward that she'd not have his death on her shoulders because of his choice to leave her Bella told him she just couldn't love him anymore because she'd allowed herself to move on and live again. She gave Jacob his chance once the Cullens were gone and they finally found love. (DO NOT WORRY this is not a Jake/Bella story it is a PAUL/BELLA it just doesn't happen instantly but it will for sure happen!)_

**Character / Pairings**** ::** _I stuck with pairings from the books for the most part and added a few of my own, there are original characters in here too that belong to me. I don't really hate the Cullens, but Edward was a butt so he's gone bye bye. The characters may not seem how you remember them, but this is four years after New Moon (__Eclipse__ and __Breaking__Dawn__ never happened in my story) so they've grown and changed. It may seem like she's focused a bit on Jake at first. Don't worry this is not a story about her thinking of him and only him just give it time because I don't want to rush it. It will be Bella/Paul so be patient. Oh and if you don't like Bella/Paul why did you bother clicking?_

**Point of View**** :: **_It will change between Bella and Paul's POV's depending on who the chapter suits best or who should be heard more. It will Always be labeled so you know who it's from so don't worry. _

**Updating**** ::** _I will try to be updating this story every Thursday for you, but I can't make any promises that I won't end up with something in rl pulling me away from putting it up that day or that I won't put one up early as a surprise. I will promise to update as soon as I can if I can't manage to do it on Thursday._

**Reviews**** ::** _I know not everyone wants to click the button and leave me a message but I appreciate it even if it's just a "good stuff" or ":)"even questions, ideas/suggestions, or criticism. (though I don't want flames for the pairings or things because if that's your problem then just don't read?) I'll take whatever you feel like giving because it makes me want to keep writing. Anonymous reviews are allowed for my story but I can't really reply to you anonymous people by pm so don't feel like I'm ignoring you if I don't acknowledge your reviews with a response. I appreciate you and what you have to say I just don't have a way to respond._

**Authors Notes**** ::** _No they won't all be this long, I just wanted to get this all out first thing so I didn't have to do it later. Normally it will just be me leaving a note at the beginning for my lovely readers._

**Disclaimer**** ::** _I do not own the Twilight Characters unfortunately or things would have ended differently. Only things that I call mine in here are the few originals and plot. The rest belongs to Stephenie Meyer_


	2. Chapter 1 :: Nothing I could do

**Authors Note :: **_Ok no prologue here just the first chapter. Leave me a review once you've read it so I know if you want to read more!_

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**Chapter 1 :: **Nothing I could do

**POV ::** Bella

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He was dead and there was nothing I could do.

I sat there my arms wrapped tight around his now cold body, the arms that had warmed and protected me through the too few years were scratched and bruised, but that didn't matter because what scared me was that they were cold and lifeless. They'd never hold me or our daughter again. His lips which had always been twisted into a bright smile were blue. He'd never kiss Alyssa good night, kiss away her booboo's or my worry lines, they'd never kiss me in a way that made me fall for him every time again. The tears stained my face, running down my cheeks leaving wet trails through the mud there and dripped onto his bloody chest. More like what had used to be his chest, it was now a ripped open ruin of what it had once been, shreds of the muscle there and bone…organs…all but the heart that had held me together.

Werewolves, they couldn't die easily but like anything else if you rip out their heart they can't just heal and keep going. Watching that happen to him I felt it, felt my own heart ripped from my chest as his was and felt my world come to an abrupt halt. His eyes had met mine for just that brief second before they'd become dull as his body fell to the ground lifeless. I felt numb, falling to my own knees as he had and I heard something, it sounded like screaming, but I didn't know where it was coming from, it may have been me. Then another sound, laughter followed by many howls that shook the ground around me, no that shaking was from the massive paws thundering my direction. The pack was here.

I didn't see the surprise in the eyes of the vampire at the number of wolves that appeared around him, didn't see or hear them rip him to pieces and didn't see them set fire to the remains. All I saw were the lifeless eyes that had once looked at me with such love and hope for the future. The eyes my daughter shared with her father among other traits. Someone was trying to pick me up, move me away from the gruesome sight in front of me but I hadn't let them accomplish their goal. I'd pulled away and run not from the bloody remains of an amazing man but to them, taking him into my arms as my body shook with the sobs escaping me. That was how I still sat now, and that was because I just couldn't let go. Letting go meant…meant it was real…holding tight I could fool myself into thinking maybe this was a dream. If I stayed here with him safely in my arms I could wake up from this nightmare and he'd be there to hold me and tell me everything would be ok.

I'd had plenty of nightmares before, many of them involved death and pain…but none had been this vivid, this real. This wasn't a nightmare, it was reality I was awake and I was coming apart at the seams because the glue that held me together was gone. How could I ever be ok again? What would I tell our daughter when she asked where daddy was? When he was coming home? Could we go see him? Any of those questions would surely break me to have to answer, and would break her if she got the truthful answer. She was a daddy's girl, she had him wrapped around her little fingers and he'd always been the first to admit to her owning his tail. He'd laughed as he'd said that the last time, two days ago. He'd laughed and then he'd gone running when she'd called for him waking from a nightmare of her own. Oh god who'd be there for her when she woke from nightmares? He was always the one who'd been right at her side waking from a dead sleep at her slightest sniffle and holding her close till she fell asleep again.

Someone was trying to get my attention, I just couldn't focus because there was a buzzing sound now in my head that just kept getting louder as things got darker. "Bella. Bella? Come on…We need to get out of here we need to take you back to the reservation ok? We need you to let go of him so we can take him back too. Please Bella come on." The voice was soft and gentle but strong and full of authority. It had to be Sam and he was wrong, we couldn't go anywhere. This wasn't right, this wasn't how tonight was supposed to go, how it was supposed to end. Tonight had been perfect, he'd asked me to officially be his wife, we'd talked about it before with Aly's birth but we'd both been too young then, we needed to grow and establish ourselves and our lives before we could get married. I'd known before we left the house that he'd ask, tonight wasn't an anniversary or even really any special day that I could remember. Tonight's date was something he asked about saying he found a new spot in the forest he wanted to show me and thought it might be a good opportunity to go on a date since we'd not been on one in a month or so. I'd agreed and through talking with the girls we'd come to the thought that tonight was _the night_ he'd ask. I had been so nervous while getting ready because I was trying not to get my hopes up just in case I'd thought too much of this…I'd been right and now everything was wrong.

I felt my arms go limp first, giving up their tight hold on his body and falling to the sides as the rest of me followed suit. I was as lifeless as he was now, and I felt myself being lifted up from the ground, his body lifted away from me as his Pack-Brother's took him home. La Push, it wasn't even a half-hours hike from where we currently were. I faded in and out of consciousness for most of the walk home, woke to the sound of my father's voice asking what was wrong as I was brought to his door. The home of him and his new wife Sue, I was happy for the two of them having each other to love and take care of. Her voice followed him giving soft directions to my room as another voice explained to my father what was wrong with me, his death. Charlie had been told about the Pack nearly three years ago, he'd learned the horrors that were really out there because of his accidentally seeing Jake phase in our back yard. He understood now why I'd acted how I had sometimes, and had forgiven me for my lies knowing I couldn't have just told him no matter how badly I wanted to. The last I heard were the soft words from a familiar voice, though currently the name escaped me. They seemed so final and cruel to hear that tears slipped from my eyes. "Jacob was attacked, vampire, he didn't make it but Bella's unharmed aside from…she saw it Charlie. She saw him die."

My world went black, and stayed that way.

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	3. Chapter 2 :: Proof it was possible

**Authors Note**** :: **_My keyboard on my laptop decided it didn't need the e, o, or enter keys anymore so it threw them off and now I'm on a borrowed computer to give you this chapter. Once mine's back from being repaired I will respond to all of my wonderful reviews I promise! For those of you asking about Jacob being imprinted to Bella the answer's yes. Once Edward was a thing of the past Bella's heart opened up to Jake and he imprinted on the woman he loved so much._

_Some may think this chapters a filler, you're kinda right. It's just to give you a sort of understanding of their lives and how things are at the moment, kinda shows what Bella's thinking about while locked up in her room._

_Still no Beta, so mistakes are my own fault and I take full responsibility xP_

_Here's the next Chapter…annnddd Paul makes an appearance in this one! So Enjoy!_

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**Chapter 2 ::** Proof it was possible.

**POV ::** Bella

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Two weeks had passed, and he was still gone.

I'd woken the next day expecting to see his face on the pillow next to me telling me it was all just a nightmare and I was being silly thinking he'd died. We'd laugh and make breakfast for Aly, correction I'd make breakfast for all of us while he generally got in my way which would make the little girl laugh and yell 'daddy inway!'. We'd moved in together when Alyssa was born so that our daughter could grow up in a family because we knew one day we'd get married. I'd given her his last name because she was his daughter and because we'd decided there was no point in naming her Swan now just to have to change it to Black later when Swan was no longer my last name. We had a routine for each day it seemed, or at least a pattern for how it would go. Wake up, have breakfast, Jake would go to work at the garage he owned with his pack-brothers, Aly and I would head to Emily's daycare center "Rug-Rats Playground". Emily had opened it a year ago and it's where I took Aly to spend the day with her godmother and other children from the rez. Knowing she was safe since none of the pack was ever far from the center. The guy's garage was right across the street actually, their sign of a howling wolf with "Howls!" written below in what seemed to be a fancy script to everyone else but I knew was my own messy scribble. The sign amused some of the older kids who spent their days in Rug-Rats, well that and the occasional show the guys put on being all goofy outside to make them laugh.

I'd head out for the knickknacky gift shop / bookstore, called "Le-Bells" thanks to Jake's sense of humor in naming our business since the women-folk had named the guy's garage. I shared ownership of Le-Bells with Leah of all people. We'd come to an understanding when I'd sent Edward away, and through that a friendship had surprised us both since we never saw it coming and were basically like sisters now. We were trouble with a capital T when together according to the guys. I had wanted to open the store so that the tribe could sell their makings such as carved figurines, jewelry, and all sorts to our few tourists or even locals. I'd also wished for a bookstore so that we wouldn't have to travel so far to get a good read, and with the books on local tribal legends and things being made. I had figured it would also help to boost an understanding of the tribe if people could read about them and where they came from or what they believed. It had been rocky to start finding a place and getting people open to the idea of selling their items through our store but we always made sure to pay them up-front for the items rather than waiting till they sold. Sure we ended up with some items that didn't sell as well as others but we didn't mind.

The money being used to run the business wasn't something I thought much of, it had come from the Cullens and while it had taken a long time to get everyone on the same page as me about using it, I'd won in the end. What was the point of having the money but not using it? Why not put it into something worth-while so it could be used toward a goal rather than sitting there collecting dust and not being available to help out with stuff because of who it was from. They were gone and I'd been given a gift I couldn't return. Basically I told the pack to suck it up because I'd use it for my shop with or without their acceptance or help. Then surprisingly when we'd asked for extra help in getting it fixed up and ready we'd gotten quite a few offers from people outside of the pack. I'd basically lived in La Push for two years by that point and knew plenty of people, but I was still surprised by the show of support. Might have had a little something to do with the man who's child I'd just had and who's house I lived in by opening time. Jacob was respected and well liked and that was how it was meant to be when you were the Alpha.

He'd officially taken the 'position' around the time Alyssa was born, claiming his birthright and taking the position from a willing Sam. There hadn't been a fight for dominance between them, Sam had known the day would come and had stepped down with honor and respect. Even as Beta he'd still been able to call everyone to order if Jake wasn't there or was part of the problem since being alpha didn't change his at times quick temper. He'd opened the garage with Embry, Quil, and Paul, and it was doing great business being the closest and most decently priced garage around. Jake had been surprised when Paul had approached him about helping start the business, he'd married Rachel and had settled down a bit. All of the pack had greatly improved their self control but no one had really expected Paul to pull it together the way he had. He'd changed for the better and he was my best 'guy friend', even helping out at Le-Bell's when he could.

When Rachel died Paul disappeared for a few months, her death had shocked everyone since it was so unexpected. Drunk driver of all things. When he'd come back it had been our doorstep he landed on and we'd taken him in without a second thought. He was Jake's brother in law and pack-brother, my best friend and Aly loved him making it obvious Paul her favorite 'uncle'. Seeing him like that had scared us all and we worried he'd never be the same again, but in time he came back around and started to let himself live again. I guess maybe I understood him better than anyone, I'd been in his shoes before no matter how much Jake liked to pretend like I hadn't. I knew the heartache well and the desire to be numb to everything; it's how I'd felt when Edward left. Here I was back in those shoes again, only this time the pain was far worse, and it scared me because this time I wouldn't have Jake to pull me through and brighten my days. He was my sun, air, and life force, he was everything to me and our daughter and now he was gone.

Ignoring the knocking on the door from downstairs knowing if it was one of the pack they knew where the spare key was or the pack-member sitting in my kitchen would let them in. I rolled over pushing away thoughts of the past and embracing the darkness of my room and life. Aly was safe with her godparents Emily and Sam, and I was here in my big bed alone. When I'd realized that it was all real the day after his death I'd asked to be taken home, I wanted to be around the things that were so familiar to me even if they hurt. I hadn't even made it three steps in the door before breaking down and was glad Sam and Paul had come with me. They tucked me in and from that day I've not been alone at any point, someone was always there. I didn't always know who since I only woke up to eat, roll over, or use the bathroom.

I'd been forced out of my bed for the funeral, it was on first beach and it was beautiful, for something so horrible. I'd held my head high and kept my daughter in my arms through nearly all of it. She didn't understand the day, kept trying to make people smile since even at her tender age of two she could tell her favorite people were sad. She'd actually yelled 'daddy in box' at the top of her lungs halfway though it, maybe some day that would make me laugh but not that day or any day soon. Emily had stepped in for me, taking her to get something to drink and a snack as I fought to keep numb, fought not to break down there. After that day she stayed with Sam and Emily but she was home some nights, wanting to be there and having been told mommy was sick. Sometimes she'd just lay in bed with me and ask every few minutes 'mommy be'ew?' but my answer was always the same, "No baby". I worried about her, I worried I was being a bad mom right now but I just couldn't get myself up out of that bed. I prayed today wasn't another day she'd lay there next to me and ask if I was better, she'd cried yesterday because she was scared mommy was going to go away like daddy. I guess one of the pack had explained that daddy wasn't coming back.

The knock on my door earned a soft groan from me and the bright light from the hall had me pressing my face into my pillow and twisting to give the door and person my back to block it out. "Bella? Can I come in?" the soft voice was Paul's and I gave a 'sure' that was muffled by the pillow. He must have understood though as he moved into the room and sat down reaching out and gently rubbing my back. He stopped by every day, checking on me the way I'd checked on him every day he'd been at his own house after Rachel's death. Now I knew how he'd felt and why he'd seemed annoyed through most of it, I just wanted to be left alone. "You know you can't stay in this bed forever right?" he asked and I just sighed. He was trying to be nice I reminded myself as I lifted my head a little but still not looking at him. "I know Paul…but I just really want to…" he interrupted and finished my sentence for me. "Be left alone I know. But I got news for you Bee. You didn't leave me alone, you didn't let me become a part of my mattress permanently and I'm here to return the favor. You will survive this, you will face the world and your daughter again, and you will be ok some day. You don't believe it now but trust me ok? And if you need someone to talk to, boss around, or to just sit here and breath I'm a call away ok?"

His words were gentle but firm, he was thinking he could drag me through this dark tunnel and out the other side like I'd done to him. I didn't want it, and I didn't know if he'd succeed but I couldn't tell him to go away like I could the others. He understood better than any of them and he wouldn't just sigh and walk away he'd show me what it was like being pestered by a pain in the ass to the point of getting up even if just to push them out the door. That was how I'd managed it so many times, driving him crazy to the point of him pushing me out the door, eventually he would go into his living room when I got there so he didn't have to push me so far. From there on out I'd talked him back into living if only to avoid my constant annoying presence. Maybe he wouldn't be as bad as me or push as hard, but he'd give it his best, which I knew could be annoying. "Thanks Paul." I said softly and put my head back down on the pillow pulling the blankets up further and listening to his steps as he walked over to the door and left me to another night alone.

I didn't believe that I could live again, but wasn't Paul proof it was possible?

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**PLZ Review, it makes me smile and lets me know someone's alive out there in the world?**

**Ok now see you made me make myself sound all hermit-ish. I do get out, I do see people. I'm just not sure they're alive? I dunno…doesn't matter. **

**LEAVE A REVIEW.**


	4. Chapter 3 :: Other Soul Mate

**Authors Note**** :: **_I will never be sending my computer to the manufacturer for repairs again. I'm not getting into my little rant here but I owe you guys two weeks worth of chapters and I'm trying hard to get them both out today, then Thursday I should be back on schedule! Reviews will be replied to asap! _

_Thank you thank you thank you to everyone for reading and reviewing and I'm sorry this took so long to get to you._

**Song Credit**** :: **_"Only You Can Love Me This Way" by Keith Urban [it's a good song go listen to it on youtube!]  
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**Chapter 3 ::** Other Soul Mate

**POV ::** Paul

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Very few things have ever made me this tired.

I was tired of seeing her back when I went to check on her, tired of going every day and getting the same answer and tired of the fake kindness she used to get me to leave. God if that was how she felt while dragging me out of my depression over Rachel I don't know how she kept going because I was running out of patience for this…fast. I understood all too well how she felt at losing the man she loved and wanted to spend forever with, and she didn't even have the additional break of being the wolf half of the imprint that I'd had to go through. It was harder on the wolf because we made the actual connection, we bonded ourselves to the person who completed us. Our soul-mates felt the pull toward us but would never understand that feeling of being totally connected to just one person who was their world. When Rae died I was a mess, I took off into the woods and stayed there for months. I'd known though that I had to go back, that I had to stand up on my feet and live again. I hadn't wanted to but if Rachel had seen what I'd become? Well she'd have kicked my pathetic ass up and down the beach and then gone for round two once I was back to normal just to make sure the lesson stuck. I'd loved her, hell I still did but she was gone and life didn't just stop when her heart did. Some days I didn't want to get out of bed, didn't want to keep going without her, but I had to.

She was my best friend and now I was just tired of watching her act like this since my best friend laughed in the face of danger and was the glue that held us all together in her own way. But now? Bella had been in her bed now for nearly a month. She'd only come out of her room when dragged into the bathroom by one of the pack so Emily, Crystal, or Leah could help and make sure she bathed. She'd eaten only when brought food and forced to eat, and she'd only seen her daughter for short amounts of time when we couldn't keep Alyssa happy anymore with games and toys and things. Bella needed to snap out of it and come back to us and she needed to do that now. I had no idea how to make her though, with me all she'd have to do is piss me off enough to make me come out of my bed to get rid of her. Maybe the same would work on the woman who'd turned that tactic into an art form basically? Maybe I could provoke a reaction? What was it that I did which annoyed her enough to drag her from the bed she'd buried herself in? Other than my music right now I was having problems thinking of something, so music it was.

Pulling up at her house I walked up to the door and didn't bother knocking, Leah was here right now since Le-Bell's closed every night at seven and today had been a bath day. Calling out a 'hello' I moved into the living room right to the stereo and unzipped the pouch of CD's in my hand. Leah lent against the frame of the door looking at me curiously, her bitch side had reappeared in this past month, without Bella to keep her (heck all of us) in check hell broke loose. I nodded in her general direction and slid two CD's into the player, the first was to annoy, the second was backup just in case annoyance out wasn't enough. Turning up the volume as loud as I could I knew that where Jake had built their house was secluded enough not to disturb anyone with the sound. Hitting play I took a step back as it blared from all corners of the room, seems Jake had hooked up the speaker system for the party we were going to throw for their engagement. The pack had been well aware of his plans, that whole can't hide your thoughts thing was sometimes a curse and other times a good way to plan a party. The discovery of the speakers being hooked up already didn't surprise me, we all had known she'd say yes even if Jake _was_ a little nervous about the asking. I was actually happy he'd hooked them up already, all the better to annoy her with since they'd blast the music at an even louder volume than I'd originally planned on achieving.

Moving past a scowling Leah I stood at the bottom of the stairs looking up waiting to see her come storming out to tell me to turn off the music or something…anything. It was rap, she should have moved fast to get it stopped but it seemed she'd play stubborn. "Come on Bella…Don't make me use plan B…" I whispered to myself seeing Leah leave through the front door out of the corner of my eye. She had no appreciation for my rap music either so I figured I was officially on 'Bella Duty' now. I stood there as the song changed twice and waited, hoping she'd give in, but she didn't and now I was left with no choice. Moving to the stereo I took a breath and glanced to the stairs one more time just to be sure the cruelty was warranted before pressing the button to switch the CD. It settled and I pressed the button till it found the song I wanted and then stood there letting it play. It was country, it was cheesy when you read the lyrics, and it was _their song._ I was going to hell for this and I knew it.

It got me a response though as it blasted through the speakers, _"Well, I know there's a reason, And I know there's a rhyme, We were meant to be together, That's why, We can roll with the punches, We can stroll hand in hand, And when I say it's forever, You understand."_ The shriek from upstairs was all the warning I had before she came flying down the stairs. Not even pausing to be amazed at her lack of falling or tripping, and stopped dead in her tracks her eyes narrowed to dangerous angry slits that made it impossible to actually see them. She lifted her hand finger pointed at me in what could only be a 'damning' way that made me sure I was going to hell as if she were pointing the way. I had a second to remember the phrase 'If looks could kill…' before she spoke, her voice low and dangerously near a growl. "You turn that off right now Paul Anthony Bayaq or so help me god…" I'd only heard her use this tone once before, and I'd prayed then never to be on the receiving end. When I'd seen the absolute terror in not only Jake's eyes but the whole pack's as she addressed Edward that day I truly never wanted to make her that kind of angry at me. I'd promised to avoid it at all costs but here I was facing it with a shit-eating grin, which I have to admit was somewhat forced because I wanted to turn it off and maybe even run away instead of stand there grinning. "Welcome to the land of the living Isabella Swan. Nice to see your legs still work. Hungry? Feel like going for a walk outside? Want to go find a carnival somewhere, eat junk food, and then find a spinning ride to see who gets sick first?"

When in doubt joke, it nearly always covered over the fact that you hadn't thought of the next part of your plan. She took a step forward, eyes still narrowed, as she stood before me in a pair of sleep shorts, a long sleeved top and with her hair a damp mess of tangles. She glanced toward the stereo and took another step as the music carried on while she was clearly planning my death, while waiting for me to give in and turn it off. _"And you're always in my heart, You're always on my mind, When it all becomes too much, You're never far behind, And there's no one that comes close to you, Could ever take your place, 'Cause only you can love me this way."_ The music blasted around us and I jerked forward in an instinctive reaction to catch her as she sank to the floor in front of me, missing by seconds. It was as if all the energy had just drained from her at once leaving her weak and unable to hold herself up anymore. It was painful to see such a strong woman fall like that, she may not see it in herself but she was like a pack-mother or sister or just a guiding light. Bella kept us in line with the help of her minions like Emily, Crystal, and Kim, even Leah did her bidding most days. She was strong when any of us were weak.

She wrapped her arms around herself and, taking mercy while praying for forgiveness, I reached behind me turning off the stereo and filling the house with a sudden deafening silence before I went to kneel down next to her. "Go away Paul…" she whispered her voice broken and shaking with the tears now falling from her eyes to the hardwood floor beneath her. I just shook my head eyes focused on the top of her head not sure what I could do to comfort her right now and a little afraid she'd break if I touched her, "Can't do that Bee, you didn't let me be all depressed and reclusive and I'm not about to let you get away with it. So your options are this…" I took a breath as she made no move to look up or even shift her position at all. "You can get up, and start living again. That's my favorite also known as option one. Option two is I can pick you up, carry you out of here drop you in the middle of the woods and let you learn to live out there like one of us officially, which really probably wouldn't help but I needed a second option." I paused waiting for any reaction out of her at my latest lame joke and still getting none I finished my 'options' for her to consider. "Or my least favorite option is number three, but probably the one you'll pick since you're stubborn like me, is that you keep this up and I keep coming back here with newer and more annoying ways to get you out of that bed till you give up the fight. What's it gonna be Bella?"

Waiting for her response was like waiting for that stupid ball to drop on new years, you could see it barely moving and you were counting but it felt like it was taking Forever. Finally after I glanced at the clock and saw five minutes had passed she put her hands against the floor pushed up so she could sit back on her heels wiping her face though the tears were still falling. Taking a deep breath and opening her broken brown eyes to finally look at me. I was suddenly hit with two painful realizations, first was the shift of the earth around me as if everything were falling apart then reconnecting all in one place, one broken person, Bella Swan. Second was the realization of which choice she picked. "Third one, but good luck since I can be more stubborn than you no matter what day and what situation. Go away now Paul." Her voice was emotionless as it answered me and she got to her feet and headed for the stairs to return to her bed while I knelt there on the floor of the living room in the house she called home with the man who'd imprinted on her before. Shit. How was that possible? Jake had imprinted on her once her heart had healed and she'd finally let herself move on from that damned vampire, I'd imprinted on Jacob's sister Rachel. How could I imprint again? How could it be on her? I needed to get up and go find Sam right now.

I didn't know what was happening, but I knew my heart was lying near dead upstairs while I walked out the door to go find someone who may have a clue. This just couldn't be possible, I'd only come here to drag her out of her depression like she'd done for me. I didn't want this, I didn't want to feel this again, I didn't…I couldn't go through this again. Rachel had been my world and the reason I woke up every morning, she'd been my fucking imprint and now with one look from her broken eyes Bella had claimed the title without even realizing. Sure she'd feel the pull, all imprints did since when you were someone's other half you tended to feel it. But I had already found my other half, and she'd been Jacob's other half. Why was this happening? As I slid behind the wheel I saw Leah go into the house I'd just left, good thing because I just couldn't handle 'Bella Duty' right now. The next second I was out onto the road on my way to find Sam and figure out a way to fix this before Bella realized something was up because as much as it bothered me to deal with this? She would Freak…Bella would not take this well at all.

How do you tell someone that you were their _other_ soul mate?

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	5. Chapter 4 :: Have Fun Guessing

**Authors Note**** :: **_and here we have the chapter owed from last week. Thursday you'll get this weeks and things will be back on schedule. Then again people might go crazy reviewing both chapters and making me feel seriously loved which would make me tempted to post the next chapter early then probably yet another chapter on Thursday? Never know…it could happen xP_

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**Chapter 4 ::** Have Fun Guessing

**POV ::** Paul

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You don't always know the answers, but you can try to have fun guessing.

Guessing is exactly what Sam and I were doing right now while we dug through the books he'd run and gotten from the Council Chambers. They held the written legends, stories, 'prophesies', and basically our tribes entire history. If we were going to find an answer to this 'question' it was going to be somewhere in here…or it wasn't going to be known. He'd asked how Bella was after seeing how I looked storming up to his front door, guess he figured I was frustrated with her refusal to get out of bed since we'd talked about my plan of approach at getting her to snap out of it. Sam knew I was going to do something, he just hadn't known what exactly since I'd mentioned quite a few options that had sprung to mind. After explaining to him the first part about how I'd actually gotten her out of bed he'd shook his head saying something about how it was a low blow but probably the only way. No one liked seeing Bella hurting and Sam had in a way adopted her as a type of little sister through time. He especially didn't want her hurting and actually I considered myself lucky he wasn't trying to find out if someone could actually injure a wolf enough to scar them.

He was right, I knew that and I knew what I'd done had guaranteed me a spot in hell because it had been cruel, but it had been the only way I'd gotten a real reaction so far. When I'd explained the second part he'd tried to tell me that wasn't possible, then tried to tell me I was going crazy. Phasing had been the only way to make him understand, because that way he could see and feel it through my eyes. Now we were on a mission to find out how this was happening, how or why or really whatever answer was possible since we'd never heard of this happening before. We were looking for something we might have missed before, but we knew almost every thing in these books by heart already. "Guys it's two am…can you call it quits and go to sleep before your angry 'I can't find it' book slamming wakes up Aly or Me again?" came a soft and frustrated voice from behind us. I turned to look at Emily standing there with a robe wrapped tight around her, hair tangled from attempting to sleep and looking more than a little fed up. This was the third time she'd been down to yell at us for making too much noise and only the first time she'd come without Bella's daughter Alyssa on her hip. Sam opened his mouth to explain but I beat him too it. "Sorry bout this Emily, we just…really need to find an answer to my little problem." he'd promised not to tell anyone, but honestly I expected him to spill his guts to her while I was gone. She was his wife, imprint, and best friend so expecting him not to tell her was like expecting to see a rainbow in the middle of the night. I suppose as long as it's while I'm not around to see the look on her face or hear her opinion on exactly which level of hell I'd be visiting it all I'd be alright.

No such luck, I should have seen it coming when her agitated look didn't budge at my explanation. It might have had something to do with her asking multiple times tonight what was going on and getting answers like 'nothing really just go back to sleep' or 'don't worry about it Emily' from us all night. Sam caved and I saw my hopes of being absent when she or anyone really was told fly out the window flipping me off as they went. "Em we have to keep looking because if we don't figure out how it's possible for Paul to have imprinted on Bella we're going to be facing a huge problem that may either wreck both of them, or may blow up in everyone's faces. We're sorry for the noise so we'll try to keep it down alright?" He was sooooo whipped and I so needed another beer right now.

I threw a quick glare at him but my eyes returned to Emily as she let out a very unladylike snort and shook her head at us as if we were children asking why the sky was blue. "Ok well let me solve this riddle so we can all get some sleep?" her answer wasn't what we'd expected and honestly we were both floored by her tone, attitude, and the plain way of saying she knew the answer. "Paul you lost your imprint, you loved her and we all know you still miss her most days because we can see it in your eyes, but it's something you've learned to live with. Bella just lost Jacob and is hurting really bad like you once were. At the time of Rachel's death the only other person who understood you was happily in love and had her own wolf who'd imprinted on her. Now she needs you because that imprint is dead causing her to suffer and need someone who understands and can help her. You need her because you've finally let yourself really live and are ready to move on with your life in some ways. So you've found each other and you've imprinted on her to guarantee you help her through this and show her love is not a lost cause. Because while you're not made specifically for each other, you are still perfect fits for who you have become, who you are today. So suck it up, keep trying to get her out of her depression and both of you stop slamming fucking books around."

It was a real show of her annoyance the tone she'd used as if lecturing small children and then swearing to top it off. Emily nearly never swore so it was odd to hear from her lips, but it made her point. We sat there staring dumbly as she walked back up the stairs. Turning to Sam I saw a faint smirk on his lips and shook my head, as I said whipped. "She's right isn't she? We're each others second chance second option…Fate knew we'd be fucked over by our first so we were lucky or unlucky, depending on opinion, enough to find another person?" My voice was full of confusion and a little anger, I didn't like how this seemed to be all just part of a grander scheme where we were only put here to play back-up, or stand in, to the lead stars once they were out of the spotlight. Sam smirk turned to a frown when I finished speaking and he looked at me as if considering the idea before answering. "Well she may be partially right with what she just said, but I still think there's something else we are missing here, it's that nagging feeling you get when you forget to turn off the stove. You know you forgot something, you know it's big, but you just can't put your finger on it and you come home to find the place up in flames."

His statement wasn't reassuring since I didn't want to think about what the burning house would stand for, heck I wasn't sure I wanted to know what that stupid turned on stove was in this situation. I might not want to know, but I was going to find out because this wasn't just about me. I couldn't stick my head in the sand and pretend like the world wasn't going on around my ass, and Bella was part of this somehow so she deserved an answer. She'd start to heal in time and when she started healing she'd start feeling and well…then she'd want me around without knowing why until I grew a pair and told her about imprinting on her. Of course she had known the feeling and the look in the eyes of a man who loved her that deeply already, she may not need me to say anything to know. I loved her already sure, but not this way exactly. She'd helped me a lot after Rachel's death and she was my closest and most trusted friend, but now that friendly love was rooted deeper and had shifted. It had become more of the kind of love that made you want to just hold the person in your arms because they were the only thing you needed to be happy. I hated how Imprinting made you feel, how it didn't leave you the option of finding out you had that kind of love for someone in your own time.

With a shake of my head I grabbed a few books from the table and floor and stood up again letting out a slow breath. I didn't know how to handle what was going on, and I didn't know what was going to even happen so it wasn't like I could prepare. So it looked like I needed to find whatever it was that is my stove and I needed to find it fast before everything went up in smoke. "I'm gonna read a bit more at home so you can sleep. I'll bring these back later and let you know if I find anything." The look on Sam's face told me something he was about to say was probably going to piss me off and I lifted an eyebrow at him. Right now was not the time to be pulling the 'Paul you need to face facts' speech or whatever he had planned. Knowing Sam it would be some sort of wisdom filled lecture and I just didn't want to hear it, but while I was still an ass more often than not, since a zebra can't change it's stripes, deep down I respected the man. I shifted my feet a little where I stood and waited. As he spoke he began cleaning up the stacks of books, making a pile of the few we'd read already and the few we hadn't not including the four in my hands.

"Sounds good to me, just…don't go by to see Bella till we have more information alright? I don't want anything upsetting her more until we know what's going on. So just put your plan of dragging her out of this on the back burner for now and I'll see if the girls will try their tricks while we try to find an answer. If this is real and you did imprint…" the growl slipped past my lips before I could stop it at this. He knew I'd imprinted, he'd seen the memory for himself and still he said 'if this is real' like it wasn't what we thought it was. He ignored my growl though and kept speaking as if it hadn't happened. "It might cause a reaction, or bring up feelings she's not ready to have yet. She could feel drawn to you and then knowing Bella she'd feel guilty for even feeling so strongly drawn to someone like that so soon." His words made sense and pissed me off at the same time, he had no right telling me to stay away from my imprint, but I didn't want to hurt her even if unintentionally. I let out a frustrated sigh and kicked the closest chair causing it to slide a little across the floor. His laugh at my obvious frustration earned a second growl as he shook his head, "Knew the old Paul was in there somewhere. Don't get pissed just do as told or I'll have to make it an actual order alright?" All I could do was nod since Sam had taken over the position of Alpha when Jake had died. Leaving as quietly as I could I looked at the house as I started up my car. The lights went out downstairs and I knew Sam was going to bed, to sleep peacefully next to the love of his life while I was going back to my big old empty place to drive myself crazy with questions about what was going on with me. Well 'Hell No to that!' my mind screamed as I quickly changed plans. I'd go to Billy's and crash in Jake's old room or the couch or something. Billy was amazingly strong for having lost two of his children, he was hurting and that was obvious, but he was still going.

Pulling out of Sam's driveway I was glad to know I had somewhere to go when I couldn't take being alone and when the 'Black-Swan Residence' was now just the Swan one and totally off limits. After Rae had died Billy had told me I was welcome any time, day or night, when I couldn't take the silence. Figure he couldn't take it sometimes too since he lived in the place alone now though someone from the pack or Charlie stopped by every day to check in with him and keep him company or go out fishing nearly every weekend. Ok the fishing was all Charlie but it kept Billy active and entertained right? Jake had gone by to his dad's every day, no matter what was going on he always made time to stop by and visit his dad. Pulling into the driveway I was surprised to see a light on inside, with the time I'd thought that Billy would be in bed. I climbed out taking the books with me and walking up to the door not bothering to knock as I let myself inside and spotted Billy sitting in front of the TV. He looked up as I came in and gave me a nod as a greeting, "Quiet night huh?" was his only question and I nodded in agreement. Sitting heavily on the couch I lent my head back and set the books aside. "Very quiet and very confusing." Billy looked away from the TV again and lifted an eyebrow at me before sighing and turning down the volume. "Out with it, and don't make a tired old man beat it outta you tonight Paul. I'm not feeling up for the fight right now."

The grin slipped onto my lips before I knew it and I chuckled shaking my head, "Gone soft in your old age Billy." I should have known he'd guess something was up. It wasn't every night I showed up at 2:30am with books and a heavy weight on my shoulders. He just kept his eyes on me giving that no nonsense 'you will talk look' and I caved. Kinda. "You ever heard of an Imprint happening twice for a wolf Billy?" his head tilted to the side a little at my random question and he frowned. "Why do you ask Paul? What's going on?" He was still sharp even after all the years he'd seen gone by and I knew then that while we may find it in the books eventually we'd find it faster if Billy told us what he knew. "I went by tonight to see if I could get Bella up outta that bed she's been in for a month now. I was mean but she was alive again, even yelled at me…" I just couldn't tell the man who was like a father to me what I'd done to his 'pale-face daughter' to get her to the point of yelling at me. Jake and Bella might not have gotten married but she was as much Billy's daughter as she was Charlie's when it came to how much the men loved her, worried about her, and cared for her well being. "Anyway there we were and I laid out her options for her, she chose the one that means I have to annoy her to death but I'll do it. What's got me on the rocks was her eyes, the second I saw them…it happened all over again Billy. My world was thrown to bits and then sucked into that tiny little woman."

I hung my head, not wanting to meet the eyes of the father of both my imprint and Bella's imprint. Both had died and here I was whining about how I'd imprinted on his son's true love. When the silence in the room stretched thin I couldn't take it anymore and chanced a look up. Billy's eyes were filled with concern, knowledge, and a little pain…I couldn't ask him to fix the problem. "Night Billy." I mumbled softly when it seemed he'd been off in his own little world where he didn't plan to come back from any time soon. As I went to stand up his voice pushed me right back down into my seat. "We need to talk son, because this is bigger than some imprinting and broken hearts. This is destiny, fate, it's foretold." His voice was heavy and as I met his eyes I wished I'd just kept my mouth shut. I'd been right before…I was not going to like this.

Why can't life just be simple, is it too much to ask?

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